Parenting 2.0

Lightening Crashes: In Memory of Baby Yuri

Posted on: December 8, 2011

When I first heard and fell in love with this song, I was in high school, blindly belting out the lyrics and barely even knowing what a placenta was. Of course that was back in the 90s, the days when this song made its debut and graced the radio waves on a daily basis. But even now, years later, when I hear it, I still love it.

Want to listen to the song? Click here:  Lightening Crashes – LIVE

It’s interesting how perspective’s change though. Since the birth and short life of my son Yuri, this song has taken on a whole new meaning for me. In the last year I’ve heard it on the radio only a handful of times and I’ve interpreted the lyrics to be about a woman losing her baby – and now whenever I hear it, although I still love it, I connect it to Yuri and almost every time the tears well.

the angel opens her eyes
the confusion sets in
before the doctor can even close the door

her intentions fall to the floor
the angel closes her eyes

lightning crashes, a new mother cries
this moment she’s been waiting for
the angel opens her eyes

And when I think about little Yuri?

oh now feel it comin’ back again
like a rollin’ thunder chasing the wind
forces pullin’ from the center of the earth again
I can feel it

Dear sweet Yuri, I think of you often.

I remember how you looked,

how you felt,

and all the details surrounding your life.

I love you.

I miss you.

And I will hold you in my heart forever.

As humans we have to be resilient. We have to move on and look to the future. And it’s amazing how things can change in a year. As I type this I am 36 weeks pregnant and looking forward to the birth of my baby girl. A baby girl, who will carry a piece of her older brother with her. A baby girl, whose life would not have been possible if it wasn’t for the events that happened one year ago, today. A baby girl that I already love with all my heart and am so looking forward to meeting and welcoming and loving.

This pregnancy has not been easy. Not so much that there were any major complications, but just the stress of it all – making it through another week, day, hour and celebrating as each chunk of time passed.

Note: While formulating my ideas for this post I looked up the meaning of the song lyrics on Wikipedia. Turns out, I’m a little off in my interpretation, but I guess that’s the beauty of poetry and all its ambiguity.

According to Wikipedia,

Lead singer Ed Kowalczyk … says that the video for “Lightning Crashes” has caused misinterpretations of the song’s intent. “While the clip is shot in a home environment, I envisioned it taking place in a hospital, where all these simultaneous deaths and births are going on, one family mourning the loss of a woman while a screaming baby emerges from a young mother in another room….What you’re seeing is actually a happy ending based on a kind of transference of life.”

But I guess in a way, there is a transference of life here: from Borys and me – to Yuri – to our unborn baby girl. And as I type these words while listening to the song on repeat, I can feel my baby inside me, kicking up a storm, and telling me of her strength.

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2 Responses to "Lightening Crashes: In Memory of Baby Yuri"

oh alllison and borys, our deep love is brimming for you both … as well as your children: niko, yuri and your baby girl.
…onwards to listen to this song…

thanks mar! Love you!

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