Parenting 2.0

Patchwork Parenting

Posted on: December 17, 2009

Upon becoming (first time) parents we have been inundated with information about how to raise a baby, and on the right and wrong ways to do things.  This information has come from various sources: the best intentions of friends and family, health care workers, magazines, the internet, books, etc. and we as parents are left to sift through and choose the pieces that we see as the best fit for our own parenting style. But what is a parenting style? How are we supposed to know which information to follow, after all each baby is unique and what works like a charm for one may be total bunk for the other! Actually, to keep myself sane I vowed not to read up too much on parenting, to sort of just go with the flow and try to follow my baby’s needs in order to keep him happy: that was until this week.

About four trusted people recommended the book The Baby Whisperer to me.  So, seeing as I had not bought any parenting books and Niko had hit the three month mark I figured this might be a good guide to help me sort out some sort of a routine. I’ve heard that by three months a lot of babies will start to sleep through the night, so why not back up my practice with a little research, some advice from an expert? With The Baby Whisperer under my belt of holiday purchases I went home and started reading. This book is a little daunting at first as it is about 300 pages of small type and no pictures, but once I started reading it, I found it easy to read and enjoyed the bits of humour peppered throughout the text.

Anyway, one of the techniques describes giving your baby a “dream feed”, which means waking him up around 10 or 11pm and feeding him in his sleep. Yes, in his sleep! The theory being that the little dear will “tank up” and be able to do the long stretch of sleep that mommy and daddy both used to enjoy in the pre-Niko days.  So “tank up” we did and sure enough after a bit of encouragement, Niko did just start eating in his sleep, though it was a little slow going at first.  After his tank was full, I lied him down and kept my fingers crossed that the next time we saw each other would be in the morning! And time passed, when what do I wake up to but Niko’s crying (which is really just like a living, breathing alarm clock!).  “Yah!” I think to myself! “We did it! He made it through the night!” Well, I should have held off on my little parent party because when I looked at the clock it was only 1:15! What?! Yes, 1:15am, his earliest wake to date! So much for the “dream feed”, all it really seemed to do was interrupt my dreams! But, the book says establishing a sleeping through the night routine takes time and patience and that I should not give up! So, on we forge, continuing to sew this patchwork quilt of parenting, together.

Note: Did you notice that everyone seems to be “whispering” these days? As far as I can tell it started with that novel/movie “The Horse Whisperer”, then came along that TV show “The Ghost Whisperer”, then my beloved Cesar “The Dog Whisperer”, and now even “The Baby Whisperer”. What is up with all this whispering?!

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7 Responses to "Patchwork Parenting"

That was a great title…you have interesting phrasing! Niko will get there with the sleep through but he is still only 3 mos and growing rapidly…so carry on!
Love mom

i agree with mom – again advice from well-intenders ….
he is only 3 mos and you are SO lucky to even get the sleep you do!! with our 3 kiddies, none of them slept through completely until well after a year!!!

Overall I know Niko is a pretty great baby! And don’t get me wrong…I do appreciate all the advice from you guys, xo

[…] I did find temporary relief when the stewardess came over the intercom and said, “We will be together for 2 hours and 14 minutes…blah blah blah”, I tuned out once I heard the time. Ok, just over two hours, WE CAN DO THIS! But then, five minutes later, when we still hadn”t left the ground, she pretty much repeated the same thing! What?! So I guess she must be referring to flying time, because even 15 minutes later, when we were finally in the air the countdown had not moved anywhere: still 2 hours and 14 min (of fun, I might add!). When Niko continued to cry, despite my best efforts at the bounce’n'jiggle jig, my friendly seatmate suggested he might be thirsty and also went on to say: “When the air pressure gets to be too much for your baby’s ears you better have cotton to put in them”. Hmm…I think I will just file that information under Usefulness Pending. […]

[…] something a little more deep, something like choosing a path for your child, or at least for your parenting style: I guess only the child can choose the right path for them self, and parents are left merely to […]

[…] I’ve mentioned before, there is a flurry of dizzying information out there about how to be a parent in the right way.  And I have noticed over the last few months […]

[…] Comment! As the days, and weeks and months of motherhood whip by, my confidence in parenting continues to gain momentum: from being a complete rookie, to successfully (kudos to me and Borys) raising an (almost) 10 month old. One, among many, major factors in parenting is feeding. First it’s: Will I breastfeed or formula feed? Then it’s: Will I make my own baby food or buy store bought? And I suppose food related questions will continue to persist from here on in. I mean there’s always things to learn and people willing to lend their two cents of advice. […]

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